Why I Am Still Single?

I was supposed to post this one yesterday but I still have to compose my thoughts on this. 😛

Last Sunday, my aunt went to the house together with my inaanak (god child) and pamangkin (nephew) – they’re actually magkapatid (siblings) and they were looking for my mom. Unfortunately, my mom was away doing her thesis on a Sunday afternoon with my dad. We had a conversation something like this:

Aunt: “JP (my other nickname), wala ka pa rin bang girlfriend?”
Me: “Ako? Wala e, maliit ang sahod, walang pangdate (Me? I don’t have yet since the salary is small, I don’t have something to spend for dating)”.
Aunt: “Lolokohin mo ba ako, laki-laki ng sahod mo. (Are you fooling me? Your salary is big!)”
Me: “Bah, akala niyo lang, pero maliit no. Hindi ako rich. (Nah, that’s what you think but it isn’t. I am not rich)”

The typical conversation followed through until I left them at home heading for the gym. That conversation ended quite funny but it get me into thinking. I’ve been turning another year older sometime next month but still I am unattached. Not that I don’t want to be with someone but I am pretty much happy with what I am right now. For most of my high school friends know, the person that I wanted to be with is already with someone else and they’re married, and with a kid (or kids, I no longer know). Not that I haven’t moved on but I guess it takes time before my heart starts beating again – for the person I think is right.

Do I sound something as “righteous”? Not really, and even if I read Joshua Harris’ “I Kissed Dating Goodbye” before, which fortunately I didn’t finish reading, I guess I am looking for the “one” whom I will be spending my life with. I don’t have time to play games with someone else and I guess it’s not my nature to hurt people’s feelings (in the best way I can, unless I am provoked *evil grin*). My personal belief on getting “hooked” or for a better term is that getting into a relationship is that, “it’s easy to get hooked with someone but its difficult to maintain it.” The same mantra works with other things on how we deal life – “fame can be easily achieved but to sustain that fame is difficult”, etc. Honestly, the previous experience in “loving” left me in great pain to the paint of I expected something out of nothing. It took me some time to ‘recover’ from that experience almost ending up to be a woman-hater.

I don’t intend to stay like this for so long. As David Gates put in his song “Never Let Her Go”:

Everybody needs a someone
Waitin to be there when things are a-lookin down
So if you feel a little lonely
Go out, find your one and only
Somewhere out there
Someone will care for you and then…
Never let her go

You may wonder how you know love
When the moment comes that youve been a-dreamin of
Well true love takes a little longer
Your heart beats a little stronger
Youll know its real
Inside you’ll feel youre home at last… then
Never let her go

Maybe my time to meet to right one hasn’t arrived yet. And when she comes by, I’ll hold her close, and never let her go. *mushy*


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